A knockout young lady decided she wanted to get rich quick so she proceeded
to find herself a rich 73-year-old man, planning to love him to death on their
wedding night. The courtship and wedding went off without any problem, in spite
of the half-century age difference.
The first night of her honeymoon, she got undressed, and waited for him to
come out of the bathroom to come to bed. When he emerged, however, he had
nothing on except a rubber to cover a twelve-inch erection, and was carrying a
pair of earplugs and a pair of nose plugs.
Fearing her plan had gone desperately amiss, she asked, "What are those
for?"
The elderly gentleman replied, "There are two things I can't stand: the sound
of a woman screaming, and the smell of burning rubber!"