A guy goes to a house of prostitution. He selects a girl, pays her $200 up
front, and he gets undressed. She's about to take off her sheer blue negligee,
when the fire alarms rings!
She runs out of the room, with his $200 still in her hand. He quickly grabs
his clothes and runs out after her. He's searching the building, but the smoke
gets too heavy, so he runs outside looking for her.
By this time, the firemen are there. He sees one of them and asks, "Did you
see a beautiful blonde, in a sheer blue negligee, with $200 in her hand?"
The fireman says, "No!"
The guy then says, "Well if you see her, screw her. It's paid
for."
Rent for Apartment
A PROSPEROUS businessman propositioned a beautiful girl and she agreed to
spend the night with him for $500. When he was ready to leave in the morning, he
told her that he didn't have any money with him but he would have his secretary
write a check for it and make it out as "RENT FOR APARTMENT"
On the way to the office, he decided that the whole thing wasn't worth the price he had agreed to pay. So he advised his secretary to send the check for $250 and include the following note:
Dear Madam:
Enclosed is my check in the amount of $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount we have agreed upon, because when I rented the apartment, I was under the impression:
Last night, I found that it had been occupied, there wasn't any heat and it
was entirely too large.
Upon the receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the check with the following note:
Dear Sir,
I am returning your check for $250. I can not understand how you could expect such a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied. As for the heat, there was plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on. As for the size, it isn't my fault if you didn't have sufficient furniture to fill it in.
On the way to the office, he decided that the whole thing wasn't worth the price he had agreed to pay. So he advised his secretary to send the check for $250 and include the following note:
Dear Madam:
Enclosed is my check in the amount of $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount we have agreed upon, because when I rented the apartment, I was under the impression:
| 1. it had never been occupied. |
| 2. there is heat. |
| 3. it was small. |
Upon the receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the check with the following note:
Dear Sir,
I am returning your check for $250. I can not understand how you could expect such a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied. As for the heat, there was plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on. As for the size, it isn't my fault if you didn't have sufficient furniture to fill it in.
Mistook a Salvation Army
There was this hooker named Jodi who mistook a Salvation Army man for a
soldier and propositioned him.
The Salvation Army gent said, "Ma'am, you may be forgiven, as a pitiful victim of circumstances. Tell me, are you familiar with the concept of 'original sin'?"
Jodi replied, "Well, maybe and maybe not. But If it's really original, it'll cost you an extra $20."
The Salvation Army gent said, "Ma'am, you may be forgiven, as a pitiful victim of circumstances. Tell me, are you familiar with the concept of 'original sin'?"
Jodi replied, "Well, maybe and maybe not. But If it's really original, it'll cost you an extra $20."
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