One day, after striking gold in Alaska, a lonesome miner came down from the
mountains and walked into a saloon in the nearest town. "I'm looking' for the
meanest, roughest and toughest whore in the Yukon!" he said to the
bartender.
"We got her!" replied the barkeep. "She's upstairs in the second room on the
right."
The miner handed the bartender a gold nugget to pay for the whore and two
beers. He grabbed the bottles, stomped up the stairs, kicked open the second
door on the right and yelled, "I'm looking' for the meanest, roughest and
toughest whore in the Yukon!"
The woman inside the room looked at the miner and said, "You found her!" Then
she stripped naked, bent over and grabbed her ankles.
"How do you know I want to do it in that position?" asked the miner.
"I don't," replied the whore, "but I thought you might like to open those
beers first."
Just Negotiating
A dirty & ugly old man walks up to this voluptuously beautiful woman and
says:
"Would you sleep with me for 1 million dollars?"
"For 1 MILLION dollars, of course I would."
"Would you sleep with me for 5 dollars?"
"For 5 DOLLARS, What kind of girl do you take me for?"
"We already established what kind of girl you are, I'm just negotiating."
"Would you sleep with me for 1 million dollars?"
"For 1 MILLION dollars, of course I would."
"Would you sleep with me for 5 dollars?"
"For 5 DOLLARS, What kind of girl do you take me for?"
"We already established what kind of girl you are, I'm just negotiating."
Just Got Out of Prison
As a hooker was dressing, she turned to her customer and asked, "Have you
just gotten out of prison?"
"Yeah," the guy replied. "How did you guess? Is it because I wanted to have sex from the rear?"
"Partly." She said. "But more because when we finished, you ran around in front of me, bent over, and shouted, 'YOUR TURN.'"
"Yeah," the guy replied. "How did you guess? Is it because I wanted to have sex from the rear?"
"Partly." She said. "But more because when we finished, you ran around in front of me, bent over, and shouted, 'YOUR TURN.'"
Horny Salesman
A salesman in a strange city was feeling horny and wanted release. He
inquired for the address of a good house of ill repute. He was told to go to 365
East West Street.
By mistake, he went to 365 WEST East Street, the office of a podiatrist. Being met by a beautiful woman in a white uniform surprised but intrigued him.
She directed him to an examining room and told him to uncover and someone would be with him soon.
He loved the thought of the table and the reclining chair and was really getting aroused because of the strange and different approach this house offered.
Finally the doctor's assistant, a really gorgeous redhead entered and found him sitting in the chair with his generous member in his hand.
"My goodness", she exclaimed, "I was expecting to see a foot."
"Well," he said, "if you're going to complain about an inch then I'll take my business elsewhere."
By mistake, he went to 365 WEST East Street, the office of a podiatrist. Being met by a beautiful woman in a white uniform surprised but intrigued him.
She directed him to an examining room and told him to uncover and someone would be with him soon.
He loved the thought of the table and the reclining chair and was really getting aroused because of the strange and different approach this house offered.
Finally the doctor's assistant, a really gorgeous redhead entered and found him sitting in the chair with his generous member in his hand.
"My goodness", she exclaimed, "I was expecting to see a foot."
"Well," he said, "if you're going to complain about an inch then I'll take my business elsewhere."
Hookers and the Little Bboy
A young boy on his way home from school must pass by a group of hookers.
Everyday as he passes them, the hookers wave at him with their pinkies and say "Hi there little boy!"
One day the boy stops and asks one of the hookers why they always wave at him with their pinkies. They reply: "well, that is what size we imagine your penis to be... it is just a joke!"
The next day on his way home, the hookers repeat the tradition.
The young boy stops and drops his school books on the ground, sticks all his fingers in his mouth to stretch his lips very wide and says, "HI THERE LADIES!
Everyday as he passes them, the hookers wave at him with their pinkies and say "Hi there little boy!"
One day the boy stops and asks one of the hookers why they always wave at him with their pinkies. They reply: "well, that is what size we imagine your penis to be... it is just a joke!"
The next day on his way home, the hookers repeat the tradition.
The young boy stops and drops his school books on the ground, sticks all his fingers in his mouth to stretch his lips very wide and says, "HI THERE LADIES!
Got Crabs from a Whore
After a few weeks, Mark felt a itching sensation in his crotch, and
discovered that a whore had given him crabs.
Heavily pissed off, he went looking for her, and found her eventually. "You BITCH! You gave me crabs!" he yelled.
She replied, "What the do you expect for five bucks?! LOBSTERS?!"
Heavily pissed off, he went looking for her, and found her eventually. "You BITCH! You gave me crabs!" he yelled.
She replied, "What the do you expect for five bucks?! LOBSTERS?!"
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