A Quick Fix

An elderly couple were at home when the wife called out "So, when are you going to the doctor"

"I told you, I'll go when I feel like going."

After 3 months of nagging, the old man finally walked into the doctors office. "Doc," he said,

"This is embarrassing, but I'd like to get a prescription for Viagra."

"Not a problem," said the doctor, as he started writing out the prescription. The old man, however, interrupted him "Doc, I forgot to tell you I need each the pills cut into four pieces."

"I know they are expensive pills," said the doctor, "but you have to take the entire pill if you want it to work properly"

"You don't understand," said the old man. "I am almost 90 years old and I haven't had sex in more than ten years. I only want it to stick out a little so when I pee, I don't pee all over my shoes."