Headache Remedy

The two housewives were drinking coffee together.

"On my way over here," said Louise, "I developed an awful headache.

Do you have any good remedies?"

Her friend Martha responded:

"When I get a headache, my husband is the best remedy. He rubs my shoulders, then the back of my neck, caresses my breasts while kissing my tummy, and... Well, you can guess the rest.

In no time at all he's soothed the pain away. You should try it!"

"I'd love to," her friend replied. "What time does your husband get home?"

Head Cure

A man comes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that his poor patient has had practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL no improvement.

"Listen", says the doc "I have migraines too, and the advice I'm going to give you isn't really anything I learned in medical school, but it's advice that I've gotten from my own experience. When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice hot bathtub, and soak for a while. Then I have my wife sponge me off with the hottest water I can stand...especially around the forehead. This helps a little. Then I get out of the tub, take her into the bedroom and, even if my head is killing me, I force myself to have sex...and almost always the headache is immediately gone. Give it a try, and come back and see me in six weeks."

Six weeks later, the patient returns with a big grin.

"Doc! I took your advice and it works! it REALLY WORKS! I've had migraines for 17 years and this is the FIRST time anyone has ever helped me!"

"Well", says the physician, "I'm glad I could help".

"By the way, Doc," the patient adds, "You have a really nice house."

Having a Bad Knee

A woman goes to the doctor complaining of bad knee pains. After the diagnostic tests showed nothing, the doctor questions her, "There must be something you're doing that you haven't told me. Can you think of anything that might be doing this to your knees?"

"Well," she said a little sheepishly, "my husband and I have sex doggy-style on the floor every night."

"That's got to be it," said the doctor. "There are plenty of other positions and ways to have sex, you know."

"Not if you're going to watch T.V. there ain't," she replied.