Got Crabs from a Whore

After a few weeks, Mark felt a itching sensation in his crotch, and discovered that a whore had given him crabs.

Heavily pissed off, he went looking for her, and found her eventually. "You BITCH! You gave me crabs!" he yelled.

She replied, "What the do you expect for five bucks?! LOBSTERS?!"

Chicken Farmer

A woman walks into her accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.

The accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll need to ask a few questions."

He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, "What is your occupation?"

The woman replies, "I'm a whore."

The accountant balks and says, "No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. 

Let's try to rephrase that."

The woman says, "Ok, I'm a prostitute."

"No, that is still too crude. Try again."

They both think for a minute, then the woman excitedly states, "I'm a chicken farmer!"

The accountant is puzzled, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore or a prostitute?"

"Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year."